Not yet! Don’t officially find out until the 2nd. The waiting is worse.

I really just want to die. There has never been a point in my life where I have been treated with dignity or respect. I was born in a place that didn’t want me, to a family that didn’t want me.

The troubled teen school I was sent to in the mid naughts had and has parents sign a form which releases them from liability if a kid gets injured. They’ve beaten the shit out of kids for things like asking to go to the bathroom, or having religious amulets.

You are clearly under mental strain and it will be hard.

That’s the thing. I have been under hellish levels of toxic stress for three years with almost zero support. All the paperwork for things like unemployment or even just applying for jobs is overwhelming. I am thoroughly burned out, I can barely take care of myself.

It’s wonderful isn’t it? My ex husband said we’d split the 90k in our bank account half way, even had it in fucking text, but the divorce lawyer didn’t want to do shit. “Oh he stopped paying the insurance before you managed to get him to file? Looks like he doesn’t have to pay insurance then!” He kicked me out, emptied my bank account, maxed out my credit cards and everyone’s like “sorry dumbass, you shouldn’t have had any faith in the justice system.”

What is the best blue city to be homeless in

I live in a red state. There are no government services. I have applied.

I have 15k in credit card debt. I have 60k in student loans which will start coming out next month and will destroy the limited budget I have. Idk if a lawyer can even help at this point.

I’ve worked hard all of my life. I worked full time in college. I did sex work which I have nightmares about. All I’ve ever wanted is to be able to work a full time job and have enough to live, and it’s just not an option. I’m a tranny in the south, I have no friends, and I might as well be a cockroach for the love and support I’ve gotten my entire life.

Yeah I’ll get to spite them by sleeping on the street!

Because VPOs show up on background checks.

I was kinda hoping maybe someone here would know how that worked, but all the advice is “find a lawyer! There’s totally lawyers that’ll help!” When there has never been a lawyer. They don’t give a shit. They want money. And sure maybe y’all have friends and shit that’ll fucking help but I don’t have a fucking bed. I can barely keep food in the fridge.

But yeah, this is what I get when I ask for help. “Help exists, you’re just too much of a dumb fuck to try doing all the things you’ve already done!”

Tell me to call 988 again so I can be sexually assaulted even more! That totally helped the last time! Tell me to use the money I don’t have to move to magical pixie land Europe or Canada, because I totally can afford a visa and get a job instantly there! Tell me to see a therapist I can’t afford! Tell me to see a lawyer I can’t afford! Tell me to sit at a food bank for hours instead of trying to find work! Life just works out perfectly! When you say “hey this person molested me” you totally get believed and someone does something about it!

The reality is I’ve spent three decades of my life begging for help, I’ve tried every fucking thing suggested here and it didn’t fucking work. My life doesn’t matter, it hasn’t mattered, and I’m just exhausted of being gaslit by being told that if I just call the fairytale lawyers and therapists everything will be fixed!

I have no money. I have negative money. I have been trying to get the bare minimum set up to move out of the country because when student loans come due there’s no fucking way of paying rent. I am trapped here. I have ZERO support of any fucking kind.

No I fucking don’t have anyone to talk to, that why I went here to get no actual advice so far.

And yeah, I know what happens when you fail to kill yourself. You get sent to a place where you can get raped and have the shit kicked out of you.

Life is hell isn’t it? There is no help.

Bruh I’ve already called dozens of lawyers.

AFABs don’t mean shit where I live, we have the highest incarceration right in the states for people defending themselves against abuse.

I’m just going to kill myself I think. All of the advice is shit I’ve already done, now I’m unhirable and there is no help.

Regardless of whether I deserved it it already happened. There’s help for AFAB people who are cis, the rest of us are shit out of luck. I’m more worried about the VPO because that leads to not being able to get a job anymore

I have. I’ve spent a whole fucking year trying.

My ex got to torture me and kick me out of my house, there was no “free legal consultation” then.

I am so fucking sick of people pretending that help exists, and it makes me want to off myself publicly so people know it doesn’t and they’ll shut the fuck up. The US is fucking broken.

I can’t afford a lawyer. So it looks like my options are to become an hero.

Child abuse is legal in the US as long as you claim to be “treating” teenagers for whatever. The TTI has zero regulation and enough money to stay that way.

“Victim protective order” “troubled teen industry” = “unregulated child abuse facilities you can send your child to if you don’t feel like parenting”

VPOs are usually for abusive ex’s that strangle you or like show up to your work months after you break up. But if you are a wealthy child torture facility, I guess it means whatever you want.

Yeah, I know the bitch spent $100 on something for him when I was prostituting myself to afford $60 for Pearson’s fucking chemistry question textbook.

He’s slightly intellectually disabled (if she had permitted him to have an education, he’d probably be normal) and she was obsessed with him. His sexuality was something that was very “open” to the family, like we all knew about his Megan Fox poster with a hole in it (which she bought for him) and the used tissues in his room were… excessive. Never cleaned up, could smell it in my room.

At one point he chased me and my younger sister around the house waving his penis at us.

I experienced something complicated from her, which toes the line around sexual abuse but isn’t as direct as “she diddled me.”

I’m of course the black sheep and have zero contact with anyone other than my sister now for having pointed out how weird/abusive the family dynamics were…

I watched it with a buddy in college. We had basically a game of showing each other the most fucked up shit we could find - exploitation films like Stalag 69 or a documentary about some danish woman who had a farm were she fucked animals. We both found it ultimately kind of boring compared to the other stuff, even lazy exploitation films which would recycle the same 5 minutes of footage for half of their runtime.

Your comparison to a strained shit is apt. It’s trying it’s damnedest to offend, but it’s the same vibe as a middle schooler in a hentai hoodie telling dead baby jokes.

Threads does sound interesting, I’ve been recommended it multiple times before.

The description reminds me of the Notebook Trilogy of novels. Also a “how the fuck do we cope with what happened in eastern front world war 2” story. Has a couple scenes that are the only times I’ve ever had to put down a book. (The video game Mother 3 takes some inspiration from these novels - the main characters are named Klaus and Lucas)